Brothers And Sisters And Friends Of The...

Brothers and sisters and friends of the air audience: ¶

Today we remember with deep affection our beloved leader Henry D. Moyle, and from his stirring sermon last April conference, we can still hear his earnest voice saying: ¶

"I believe with all my heart and soul that the solution to our problems here upon this earth today and tomorrow is to be found in the knowledge and appreciation of man's relationship to God, his dependence upon God, and his obedience to God's laws. ¶

"There is absolutely nothing of such great worth to man as to know God." ¶

In my childhood, we had mottoes hanging on our walls sometimes embroidered, sometimes painted, these for decoration and for inspiration. One I remember read: "What is home without a mother." From my infancy, every time I entered the house, I called, "Mama," ¶

over and over until I found her. Totally satisfied in the security her presence afforded, I ran again to play. Just to know she was there! That was all. ¶

When I was eleven, Mother passed away and from my aching heart came numerous times, "Mama," as I entered the house, but there were only mocking echoes of emptiness. Later the void was filled when our stepmother gave presence to the home and again through my youth, I called and found my security in the welcome answer, "I am here, son." ¶

It was the same red brick house through the days of security and the days of desolation, the same shelf-filled pantry, the same wood stove and water tank, the same parlor with its rag carpet and the same old clock ticking away the hours and days and years, but stability and sureness and peace were there, for Mother was there, and security was there, and the house breathed belongingness. ¶

On Labor Day 2,000 young people converged on the little resort town of Seaside, Oregon, repeating their last year's devastation, smashing windows, ripping street and shop signs down, and requiring 100 police plus National Guardsmen to quell the rioting, and I wondered if these 2,000 homes from which they came were normal ones with a mother at home who could answer, "Yes, dear, I am here." ¶

Again, the news reported 30,000 teenagers rioting on a California beach, filling beer cans and bottles with sand and throwing them at police, boys stripping girls and sex indulgence common and unabashed. And we wondered how many of these 30,000 fathers were furnishing cars and money for their children to vacation at resorts; for beer and brutishness, and who provided the gasoline, and who paid the fines? ¶

And, we wondered how many of the 30,000 mothers were making homes and how many making money. How can mothers justify their abandonment of home when they are needed so much by their offspring? Rationalization must take over as they justify themselves in leaving home and children. ¶

Of course, there are some mothers who must work out to support their children, but let every working mother honestly weigh the matter and be sure the Lord approves before she rushes her babies off to the nursery, her children off to school, her husband off to work, and herself off to her employment. Let her be certain that she is not rationalizing herself away from her children merely to provide for them greater material things. Let her analyze well before she permits her precious ones to come home to an empty house where their plaintive cry, "Mother," finds no loving answer. ¶

Do not these absentee mothers and millions of approving fathers know that basic attitudes towards standards, morality, the Church, and God are developed in the family circle and are quite well set while they are still small children? ¶

It is said: "Give me a child until he is seven and then do with him what you will." These first years are so vital. ¶

The Lord said: "My sheep hear my voice . . ." (John 10:27). So do the little ones respond to their own mothers. The maid, the neighbor, the sister, the grandmother may clothe and feed and diaper the child, but no one can take the place of mother. This is impressed upon us by the story of the six-year-old who got lost from his mother in a large supermarket and began to call frantically, "Martha, Martha." ¶

When the mother was found and they were reunited, she said: "Honey, you should not call me Martha, I am 'Mother' to you." ¶

To which the little fellow rejoined: ¶

"Yes, I know, but the store was full of mothers, and I wanted mine." ¶

Children need security, special love, and to be wanted. ¶

At a distant conference, my plane brought me to the city many hours early. The stake president met me at the airport and took me to his home and, having important work to do, excused himself and returned to his work. ¶

With the freedom of the house, I spread my papers on the kitchen table and began my work. His wife was upstairs sewing. In mid-afternoon, there came an abrupt entry from the front door, and a little fellow came running in, surprised to see me, but we became friends. Then he ran through the rooms calling, "Mother," and she answered from upstairs, "What is it, darling?" and his answer was, "Oh, nothing." He went out to play. ¶

A little later another voice came in the front door calling, "Mother, Mother." He put his schoolbooks on the table and explored the house until the reassuring answer came from upstairs again, "Here I am, darling," and the second one was satisfied and said, "OK" and went to play. Another half hour and the door opened again and a young teenager moved in, dropped her books and called, "Mother." And the answer from upstairs, "Yes, darling," ¶

seemed to satisfy, and the young girl became acquainted with me, then began practising her music lesson. None of the three had gone upstairs. ¶

Still another voice later called, "Mother," as she unloaded her high school books. And, again the sweet answer, "I am up here sewing, darling," ¶

seemed to reassure her. We became acquainted, and she tripped up the stairs to tell her mother the happenings of the day in a sweet motherdaughter relationship. Home! Mother! ¶

Security! Just to know Mother was home. All was well. ¶

A child is happy if he feels that he is wanted and enjoyed by his parents. ¶

He needs to feel that his parents will be there, especially in a crisis. ¶

This mother, too, could have had a job. Her children also could use more things her wages could provide. She also could have rationalized that two salaries could give her children more advantages, more outings, travel, and vacations, more clothes, gifts, and luxuries. But, this mother knew well that a child needs a mother available more than all the things which money can buy. ¶

The Parents Magazine says: "The feeling of security is the core and foundation for good mental health. ¶

"Most of the married women over 35 in the labor force (says this authority) are working not because their families really 'need the money,' but in order to maintain a higher standard of living, get away from some housework, and first Day lead, as they suppose, a more interesting and richer life." ¶

A prominent judge listed the causes of juvenile delinquency: ¶

First, destructive toys and games such as guns and other symbols of violence. ¶

Second, working mothers; and third, fathers who work two shifts, absenting themselves from the home except to eat and sleep. ¶

His long list of causes ended with this: ¶

Lack of religious training and discipline in the home and schools, and lack of love in the home. My reference is Judge Jacob M. Braude of the Circuit Court of Cook County (Chicago), Illinois. ¶

These lacks were inherent in the parents, but it was the children who suffered. ¶

Twenty-four million women in the United States work outside the home. ¶

This is one-third of all in the total labor force, and 80% of them have living husbands. ¶

In 1890, only 5.5% of the wives under 35 and living with husbands were working. By 1957, it was 27.7% and now it is about a third of those wives between 18 and 24. ¶

In the labor force are about 2.5 million women whose children are under six, and 5.4 million with children under twelve years of age. Think of it: a possible twelve to fifteen million children without a mother through crucial hours! Of these about 400,000 children under twelve years of age must care for themselves entirely while their mothers work. One-third of all mothers with children under eighteen are in paid employment. My statistics come from the Children's Bureau of the US Department of Health Education and Welfare and other dependable sources. This means that in this country, one child in 13 under 12 must look out for himself. In the 10-11 year old group, the ratio is one in five without care while the mother is at work. ¶

It is shocking! Nearly one-third of all our young matrons, 18 to 24, arc breaking the law of God in not bearing children, or if they are having children, are they neglecting the helpless little ones? ¶

President McKay said, "The more l W. KIMBALL 37 woman becomes like man, the less he will respect her. Civilization weakens as man's estimate of woman lessens." ¶

We are told that the average age when women cease bearing children is about 26; yet in these vital years, nearly one of every three is working outside her home. When such masses of mothers are employed out, what may we expect from the offspring? ¶

How nearly perfect can a mother be who rushes in the morning to get everybody off and settled for the day, herself included, then returns weary after a hard day of employment to a tired husband who has had a hard day and to children and youth with problems, and then to her homemaking, cooking, cleaning, and then to a full social calendar. From such homes come many conflicts, marital problems, and divorces, and delinquent children. Few people in trouble ever ascribe their marital conflicts to these first causes, but blame each other for the problems which were born and nurtured in strained environments. Certainly the harmonious relationship of father and mother and the emotional climate prevailing between parents give soundness and security to children. ¶

President Belle S. Spafford speaking to her world of Relief Society mothers said: ¶

"Children should be cherished with the strongest bonds of affection; ... No effort should be too much, no sacrifice too great to protect them from evil and preserve them in righteousness. . . . The love and the sanctity of the home should be zealously safeguarded. . . ." ¶

And she speaks of mothers' obligations— ". . . to make all else in life subservient to the well-being of our homes and families. ¶

***** "Always in the Church, people have been admonished to marry in the House of the Lord, to establish homes, and bear and rear children in righteousness." ¶

Brigham Young says: ¶

"It is the calling of the wife and mother . . . (to tie) her offspring to herself with a love that is stronger than death for an everlasting inheritance. . . ." (Discourses of Brigham Young, p. 198.) In this important city crime has increased three times faster than it did in the nation during 1962, said our local newspaper. And crime in the past five years increased four times faster than population, four serious crimes per minute recorded on the crime clock. ¶

One authority gave us: "The more the parents approve of each other, the more the child will be welcome, — the most important single factor in the development of the child is the emotional climate prevailing between his parents." ¶

Are music and dancing lessons and camps and clothes justified when it may mean the sacrifice of the home and mother on the altar of employment? ¶

One girl said, "I really don't want to go to the girls' camp. I'd rather stay home with Mother, but Mother is not home to stay with." Are we glamorizing out-of-home activities for our children when they should be home helping or off to work themselves? ¶

Absenteeism of mothers is often linked with idle youth — delinquent youth. ¶

When we read of the recent Labor Day escapades by tens of thousands of high school and college young people on their mass invasions of resort towns, we wonder again: Why are they permitted leisure till they become sick with boredom? Home is drab so they resort to destructiveness and immorality. ¶

One fudge said: "These mad vacations make their biggest appeal to youngsters who have too little to do. . . . We never have any trouble with kids who have real interests, real hobbies, a radio ham, or a real athlete." ¶

The idle generation! Hours each day and nothing to do. Saturdays and nothing to do. Three long months of school vacation and nothing to do. No one has found a truer adage than: "The idle brain is the devil's workshop." ¶

Another judge states that "Too many kids are loafing. Parents do not make children get jobs. And, this helps them into trouble . . . there is an alarming lack of employment among our young people . . . and idleness among those who come before me. . . ." ¶

He is not talking about the pallid, spindly urchin, working twelve hours a day in coal mines but of the hulking youth sitting around while his hardworking, doting parents support him. ¶

It is foolish to expect an energetic exuberant youth to live normally when he has his free time largely to himself including three idle months of summer vacation. I quote him further, "As I see young people of what I consider an employable age sitting around drive-ins or malt shops, on park benches, or at the beaches, cruising around in cars or hanging around on the street comers at all hours of the day and the night, I am amazed at their ability to stay out of trouble as well as they do . . . idleness is a prime factor in most juvenile misbehavior. . . ." ¶

He continues: "I find the average parent of the average employable but unemployed youngster to be weak, overprotective, and overindulgent. Both he and his wife work to afford their child the niceties of life which they now consider necessities. All the comforts of home plus a car and a gasoline credit card " ¶

This judge says these parents are a generation of well-intentioned ones rearing a generation of sloths — Judge Robert Gardner of the Juvenile Court of Santa Ana, California. ¶

A woman who had not been able to hold a job in spite of the fact that she was well-trained and highly educated explained: "Oh, it's not odd at all. ¶

My parents never expected me to work, and for that reason I never expected to either." She seemed to feel unabashed, and that such was reason enough. ¶

The judge proceeds: "This type of parent blindly accepts Junior's plaint: 'I can't find a job.' "Can't find a job! Well, Junior, I have news for you! These are boom times. A whole generation of us grew up during the depression when there were no jobs, but we found jobs anyway. Oh, they weren't good jobs, but they were jobs. There were always jobs — mean, disagreeable, back-breaking jobs. And many of these jobs didn't pay very much and they were hard and they were long hours and they were not desirable." ¶

Do youth look for work in the cotton fields, in the beet fields, in the hay fields, the jobs that are taken by itinerant workers brought from Mexico and other foreign lands? ¶

Some judges give arrested youth a choice to get a job within thirty days or be locked up, and seldom have had to lock up any. If the alternative is unpleasant enough, somehow Junior finds employment. ¶

To this philosophy, there are rejoinders from many sources which cry there are not enough jobs to go around and that a job for a youngster means a job lost to the head of a family. And the answer of the judge to this is, "Get women out of the factories and put them back into the home where they belong . . . cooking, sewing, cleaning house and doing the traditional woman's work. It would do both for them and their neglected youngsters a world of good." ¶

If a few million of the working mothers who need not work were to go home to their families, there might be employment for men now unemployed and part and full-time work for youth who ought to help in family finances and who need occupation for their abundant energy. ¶

How many children today contribute toward the family living? Parents permit the youth to idle away their time. ¶

"Can't get a job," they say. Why, bless your souls, the world is crying for helpers. Have we spoiled our children paying them for every effort? I heard a fifteen-year-old complaining because he received only sixty cents an hour. ¶

"What can we do?" they cry, "Where can we go?" Listen, youth, go home, roll up your sleeves; pick cotton, hoe the corn, thin the beets. Yes, before and after school and Saturdays and vacation days! It won't hurt you to store your ball and bat and hiking togs. Hang the storm windows, paint the fence, wash the car, pick the fruit, mow the lawn, repair the screen, plant a garden, cultivate flowers, trim the trees. ¶

As we read of delinquency and crime, 2,000,000 serious crimes in this land in a year, and as we note many are committed by girls and boys, we ask ourselves what is the cause and what are the cures? In an adequate survey it was learned that a majority of youth wish responsibility and will thrive on it. ¶

"What can we do?" they ask again. ¶

Do the shopping, work in the hospital, help the neighbors and the church custodian, wash dishes, vacuum the floors, make the beds, get the meals, learn to sew. ¶

Read good books, repair the furniture, make something needed in the home, clean the house, press your clothes, rake the leaves, shovel the snow, peddle papers, do "baby sitting" ¶

free for neighbor mothers who must work, become an apprentice. ¶

J. Edgar Hoover of the FBI said, "Our youthful delinquency is a problem which strikes practically every home in America. It is something to which every parent should give the deepest consideration and the said responsibility for youth law infraction today lies more on the doorstep of the adult than it does on the youth. In the majority of instances the story of juvenile delinquency is the story of shattered homes where parents are neglectful, indifferent, and fail to exercise the proper degree of discipline." ¶

One parent wrote to youth: "Your parents do not owe you entertainment; your villages do not owe you recreation facilities; the world does not owe you a living; you owe the world; you owe it your time, your energy, your talents, yourself. In plain simple words, grow up, get out of your dream world; develop your backbone, a backbone not a wishbone, and start acting like a man or a lady. . . ." ¶

Lawmakers in their over-eagerness to protect the child have legislated until the pendulum has swung to the other extreme. But no law prohibits most work suggested above, and parents can make work. ¶

President David O. McKay said: "We are living in an age of gadgetry which threatens to produce a future generation of softness. Flabbiness of character more than flabbiness of muscle lies at the root of most of the problems facing our American youth." ¶

Are these iconoclasts from normal homes with normal fathers and mothers? Or, are those parents income producers who satisfy their every selfish desire for social life, comforts, golf, parties, travel, drinking at the expense of their children? ¶

Do the families of these window smashers kneel in prayer night and morning before these depredations? Do they have family evenings, family picnics, vacations, and entertainment together? Do these parents of such hoodlums exercise discipline in the home or are the children emancipated from restraint, from duties, and from controls? ¶

To slow down this ever-increasing rate of juvenile delinquency, there is a growing cry: "We must have more detention homes and reformatories. We need more public money appropriated for better facilities, more highly trained specialists, social workers, psychologists and psychiatrists. We need larger jails, more police." ¶

Certainly, it must be apparent that all this is but an attempted control of a malady of epidemic proportions. Have the experts failed? Isn't it time to come back to fundamentals? "We need more money," they say, but we have spent in the last decade $78 billion on elementary and high schools for the children, yet delinquency increases; $110 billion on cars; $127 billion for recreation, and still immorality, hoodlumism, sadism, and vandalism grow apace, and to make it worse, $180 billion in cosmetics, tobacco, and alcohol. ¶

No — money is not the answer! Surely we must realize that an ounce of prevention is worth tons of cure. ¶

The Lord has indicated long ago the perfect pattern of prevention. He has organized the family in a home with unified pursuits. It takes no magician nor social authority to know where the error lies, and that the cure is prevention. With the home a sweet religious one with discipline and love and parental bliss and sweet parent-child relationships, there would be few, if any, prodigals. Reformatories and correction institutions could close; social agencies could lock their doors; jails would have few prisoners, and war be outlawed. ¶

All this could come by the building of the homes of the people into spiritual fortresses. If fathers would give themselves to their families and mothers come home from employment and high society to conserve the smaller incomes and to be real mothers, then the word delinquency would cease to terrify us. ¶

May we organize our homes, discipline our children, and create nations of homes such as our Heavenly Father has planned, I pray in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen. ¶